This Blog Has Moved

Refiner's Fire is now on wordpress.

It has been re-titled as "My Roaring Twenties".

http://nlmullins.wordpress.com/

For all future posts, please visit/bookmark that site. It will be under construction for a little while, however.

Ah, the days of Chaucer...

New poem written! Finally, some good words come to me.

"Nice Guy Rap"
by Neil Mullins

So they think I'm the nice guy
Sweet, thoughtful, polite
But can't they see I'm the right guy
Even though I don't fight?

The jerks always invade
Before I get a chance
Leaving me high and dry
And the girl in a trance

[Chorus]
I'm a door opener, yea
I'm a good friend, a counselor
I'm the one who's there
Every, every time to catch her

Well I know what Leo said
But that don't make it true
"Nice guys finish last"?
Sho messes with the head
But I ain't no foo'

CHIVALRY ISN'T DEAD!
It's just harder to find
USE YOUR HEART NOT YOUR HEAD!
Cuz love's not of the mind

So the next time you notice him
Or someone like me
Think twice about the Nice Guy
Talk to him, you'll see...

[Chorus to fade]

Christmas: A Different View

Merry Christmas to you all! And since this is the last blogpost this year, Happy New Year as well. My Christmas was great, it went on all month, gift-wise... but I loved giving to the people I gave to much better, and spending good time with family and friends. As I write this, it is still the 25th, but by the time I post, it won't be. Small point being: this post counts as a holiday post, especially with the poem here. It's about the birth of Jesus... only this time, it's from Joseph's perspective on being a prospective father (something I don't hear in today's Christmas media, so I thought I'd take a whack at it). It's meant to be a monologue to God from him, and also moves to the death and resurrection of Jesus. (For more dramatic effect, put in a full orchestra in the background, and throw in a bit of tone from Fiddler on the Roof. This poem is also meant to be sung, but i don't have the equipment to record that and put it on here.)

"Joseph's Monologue"
by Neil Mullins

Why did he have to be born... here?
Why did he have to be born... now?
Why did it have to be him,
To which all knees might bow?

Just... why?...

Couldn't it have been at home?
Couldn't it have been later?
I shouldn't have promised her,
We shouldn't have come,
I can break this,
I still have the cha-ance!

But... no.
I still love her
I can't do that
To disobey
The Will of God

He will show him
He will lead him
Guide him everywhere
His feet will trod!

Yet... tell me why... why do I feel so alone?
~~~~~~~
How did it come... to this?
How could they kill... my son?
The one who I saw become a man
And was to be... the anointed one?

Just... how?...

You told me to call him Yeshua
Such a common name, at the time
And now this name hangs on a cross,
Tell me, how could this death... be called "sublime"?
~~~~~~~
Wait... what's this I hear?...
Shouts of joy and acclamation!
He embraces me, saying, "No tears...
I truly have come back,
To save this nation!

Now I realize it,
And for this my knees do bow:
Since I know this new Life,
I understand the why... and the how.

The Musings of a Single Young Man, Part 4

4th out of 5 in this poetic suite...

"Seasons of Attraction: Summer"
by Neil Mullins

It is twilight; a Summer's eve soft and clear
An orchestra full of stars is out to play
I lean my ear towards them; oh sweet music!
I stand and wait for my muse, I know she is near.

Though my toes touch the ground, I do not feel it
A golden season, and a drunken heart, I must admit
Though the drink is not wine; it is hope and love
Feeling endless; as sweet, warm winds from above.

I will run o'er the shore, seeking the one who eludes me
To find her... beyond the sunset, hold hands, and be free.
The heat wont bother us, we shant be found
And the love we share will be strong, as waves unbound.

The Musings of a Single Young Man, Part 3

Poem #3 of the suite of 5...

"Seasons of Attraction: Spring"
by Neil Mullins

Well into the Spring morn, I walk through sunbeams
And scattered showers enhance the path I'm on
I look all around me, and though all has bloomed
I see no airy love, no one in my daydreams.

Granted, I feel strong from my head to my heels
But in the Springtime, with every new fantasy, my heart reels
For I am tempted to run with winged feet
Through verdant fields, chasing that kindred spirit.

Sometimes I like to wander with the birds and the flowers
They will fly and blow and mate and pollinate for hours.
I would like to find such warmth in me too,
Perhaps hope is found in the next grass-covered view?

The Musings of a Single Young Man, Part 2

Second poem in the suite...

"Seasons of Attraction: Winter"
by Neil Mullins

Dawn is gray, and the Winter sun is still below
It will rise clear over a stillborn landscape
I look out over the cold, silent stillness
My eyes search for warmth, in vain, on this plateau.

The bleak longing of my soul touches my bones
During the Winter I accept my reality alone
And I soar over lit windows and smoke;
The North wind ruffles through my wings evermore.

And yet I also observe from above this snowy waste
New growths of grass and leaves are springing up, with due haste.
Could it be, that from frozen streams and ground
Warmth in abundance, which melts the snow, can be found?

The Musings of a Single Young Man, Part 1

I've decided to post my most recent poetry project, which, due to the demands and attitudes caused by school, has taken over 2 months to do, and is still not complete. It is a suite of five poems, and... well, you'll see what it's about. One poem left to write for it, and maybe by the end of the week that one will be out, too.

Comments and questions are welcome.

"Seasons of Attraction: Autumn"
by Neil Mullins

On a cool Autumn day, when the sun settles down
And the clouds are scattered on the horizon
I look off to where the paint meets the canvas
But my mind is not where my eyes gaze upon.

No, it is where my heart looks that my mind thinks
And during Fall I often wonder if I am on the brink
Of becoming the only stone in the yard
To weather the gales and rain for years to come.

And yet I also ponder amidst the hues in the trees
If it is not too late to try and harness the breeze,
To fly down closer to the source of warmth,
Even though, with each passing day, it is fading?

Mullins Bullets, Part 1

I think it's time I took a short break from posting poetry on this blog (but I have not stopped writing poetry, of course).
Most people of college age will "find themselves" during this time in life. I am no exception to this. As such, I would like to share with you all some of the points of what I have learned in this process, from God, through the experiences He has given me. I call them "Mullins Bullets" (nice ring to it, yes?). Please pardon how crude and unformed these points may sound in form, and rather try and focus on their content. I'm trying to go for profundity in as short a space as possible, instead of writing a book and becoming long-winded and losing track of the point. (It is a hard thing to strike a balance for, and right now it feels like I'm going to fail miserably. But I'm gonna try this anyways.) Also, these points are mostly based on observations from the ministry of Jesus' life (or so I would like to think), so they seem to me to be good ways of living one's life.

If you have feedback, it is surely welcome. Comments, encouragement, questions, etc. Especially if you want more explanation (though I would rather we talk in person about that). There is no priority system to these points; it is unorganized.

• The best way to combat fear is not with more fear, but with love.
• Human beings have as much a capacity for love as they do for depravity.
• Do not make religion out of politics, and do not make politics in religion.
• There is always hope in the Lord for those who seek it; hope only in God and the things of God, not in false things.
• Use metaphor sparingly, but use analogy generously.
• The point of evangelism is to keep the conversation going.
• Sharing of faith is also sharing of love. Love is a two-way street. Therefore, sharing of faith must involve a mutual exchange of sharing beliefs.

I do hope this encourages someone, somehow. For this whole entry feels rough.

But since when has the subject of Jesus' love and sharing it ever been ultimately about eloquence of speech?

Turn that TV off. Spend time with real people.

New poem.
Or at least one I'm willing to post.
Selfish and kind of a downer, I know.
Just bear with me.
I'm sure you've felt like this, too, at times.

"The Bad News Song"
by Neil Mullins

Well I'm listening to songs
In minor key, obbligatos
And the news on the TV's all wrong,
Please hear me, my ostinato:

I never get any good news
I never get any good news
I never get any good news
At all...

Don't be mistaken
I'm happy for y'all
But the good news you've given
Is yours, read my scrawl:

I never get any good news
I never get any good news
I never get any good news
At all...

Would you change the channel?
Cuz I don't wanna see anymore
Don't need a control panel
To see this me, for the record:

I never get any good news
I never get any good news
I never get any good news
At all...

Modern Phileo

30th post! Cool.

Anyways... it sure has been an interesting first seven days of school. Pomona Crusade has gotten off to a good start, and there are many freshmen and transfers interested in involvement here.

However, some of my friends at other schools have been under spiritual attack or in ugly situations, and it grieves me that they suffer these things... especially when those who are in trouble are my sisters in Christ. Now, in my experience, since I consider my relationship with my own sister to be pretty good, I treat my sisters in Christ like I treat her: with love, respect, sensitivity and more importantly, help. Help in listening to their problem and letting God work through me to advise them on it, whether that means finding them other sisters to help them out or working through them with it, if the situation is within my understanding. Of course, this happens with my brothers too, but more often lately it has been happening with my sisters. And... it just wounds my heart, to see them in pain like that; and because of Christ's love for the lost, even those temporarily lost, even for me... it wells up in me a response of:
1. Shock that it is happening
2. Sorrow at the pain
3. Compassion
4. Slight anger at the enemy (a big brother's classic response)
5. A showing of love, a pouring out of myself because of Him and because of the warmth and lovingkindness that they have shown me in my times of trouble.

It's an odd mix, I know, but I just can't break it down for you in any other way. It has gotten me to wondering lately, "I don't understand... why do they have to be in pain? And why did God give me all this love to pour out?" I don't feel worthy for it often, and sometimes I'm very tired when I first hear of a given situation. But for some reason, God gives me the strength and wisdom to respond, and to try and help them out of harm's way.

I don't mean to sound like the hero here, and I don't mean to boast either. I'm just telling it like it is. And I also know the answers to those wonderings: it's because God intends for me to be the brother to them at those times, and to show them His grace and love. But not just at these times, either. Being a brother is a full time job.

If that doesn't make it clear to you out of the sheer fact of redundancy, then perhaps this poem will.

"My Rose"
by Neil Mullins

You, my rose, are beautiful;
You, my rose, are deep.
And you, my rose, have petals
Soft, through which the Light seeps.
You, my rose, smell lovely;
You, my rose, are a flirt.
But you, my rose, have thorns
Sharp, which make my hands hurt.
You, my rose, are colorful;
You, my rose, are young.
For you, my rose, capture my
Gaze, and my heart is flung.
A rose is as love, both pretty and stinging
Yet I will let my hands drip blood whilst I am singing.
----------------
Now playing: Jars of Clay - Something Beautiful
via FoxyTunes